It’s only kind of dead. Like a moderate coma, dead. Chivalry is a vegetable.
A crazy notion, I know. But what would you say if I were to tell you I went on a date that wasn’t planned 45 minutes before. A date that wasn’t JUST “drinks at *insert shitty bar name here*”. What if I told you I went on a date with food. and drinks. and an activity! What would you say if I told you that despite falling flat on my ass in the middle of a crowded restaurant (fuck me, right?) this gentleman suitor still held my hand, told me i was pretty, and kissed me so I felt it.
He did not let me walk on the outside of the sidewalk. He did not ask me to split the bill (one of my biggest pet peeves). He did not even make me feel super stupid for completely wiping out… or being so accident prone. He was great. 10 out of 10, would recommend.
Too often single girls in the city are being invited last minute to drinks in a dimly lit bar with draft PBR. *there is nothing wrong with draft PBR, but I’m not entirely sure there is something right about it either.*
Quick dates that lead to quick black outs that end in quick/sloppy/unsatisfying sex. God I love the app dating lifestyle *hard eye roll*.
I’m not 100% sure when a last “yo girl. drinks tomorrow? emoji emoji” followed by splitting the bill in some dark, hallowed hall of shameful nights past became the only groundwork boys (yes, boys) needed to lay before we (ladies) allow them to lay us. Quite frankly, I don’t even believe that scenario would (nay should) warrant a nice over the jeans cock rub. A piece of me wants to blame feminists; mostly because I feel the need to blame SOMEONE for this outrageous “new era”. Fuck the wage gap! Let a man buy you dinner and stop ruining it for the rest of us! Let him open your car door. Let him steady you with his large hand on the small of your back. Let him do these things and I promise you, he’ll not only put you on a prim/pretty/proper pedestal, but you’ll get your turn to lead during that horizontal mambo. hashtagpreachgirl.
Also to blame (because lemme tell you, there is enough to go around): our quick culture, especially in a city. We are beyond addicted to having everything RIGHTFUCKINGNOW. With apps like Tinder, Bumble, JSwipe, what the fuck ever; we have a nearly unlimited supply of people (men and women alike) at our literal fingertips waiting to trade beers for blowjobs. Fast, casual dates have become this weird and deranged form of sexual currency.
It’s safe to say, I’m not in to it. This dating game where I’m putting out for warm beer at a Cubs game (FTR, I haven’t). And the date I went on with this chivalrous unicorn was great. He planned an ACTIVITY outside of the usual burgers and beer. He took me to a totally cool (and I admit, kind of cheesy) Italian restaurant in Chicago. Pun, intended. We went on a tour of the most haunted places in the city (on Halloween). We got drinks at a super cool historic place. And he politely invited me to his apartment complete with incredible views. It was a whole… THING. And not once, did he hint that he expected something more than a polite, “goodnight”.
The world needs more of you, sir. (Because you’ve harassed me enough about this article and I know you’re reading it.) And ladies, we need to let men be this way. We cannot bully them for being “soft” or “weird.”
All images were found on Pinterest. Image does NOT belong to writer. Pinterest search: lost things, love